Who can be baptised?
For a start, not just your children! Baptism (“Christening”) is a gift from God which can be conferred at any age, and the Parish Clergy would be most happy to speak with you about that step in your own Christian journey. It is increasingly common for Parents or Godparents not to be baptised, and we can arrange that (usually in a low key midweek service when you are accompanied by close family and friends).
If you live within our parish boundaries or are on our electoral roll (church membership roll), your child can be baptised at any one of the Ashbourne Group of Churches. If you aren’t sure where the boundaries lie, we will be happy to advise you. If you don’t live in our parish your child can be baptised here, but we need to obtain the permission of your own parish priest. We encourage people to be baptised in their own parish church, because that's where you'll start making friends and feel part of the family.
We invite you to come to Holy Communion at least once before your child is baptised so that you feel a connection to the Church, and have the opportunity to remind yourself of the important promises you will be making on behalf of your child. If you live in another parish, before the permission of your own parish priest can be given, you may also need to attend the principal service there.
Baptism is a free gift from the Church. There is no fee for Baptism, but we do need your help and do suggest a donation. Please know we will not turn anyone away.
Lone Parents and Unmarried Couples
Baptism expresses God’s love for your child and his unconditional welcome for them (and you!). We aim to be just as welcoming whatever form your family takes. Your marital status, orientation or personal circumstances does not have any bearing on whether or not you or your child can be baptised. If anything about your family circumstances worries you we will, of course, be happy to listen and try to help. We seek to be a welcoming and inclusive church that is committed to showing God's love to all.
Booking
To book or make enquiries about Baptism at St Oswald's or one of our other churches, please complete the Baptism Enquiry Form. Once completed, one of the Church team will be in touch with you.
What happens in the Baptism Service?
We normally hold baptisms at a separate service just for your family in the afternoon: that way we can focus on your particular needs. It is not a private service. Alternatively, a baptism can take place during the main Sunday morning service (where you will be surrounded by the church family). Anyone can be baptised at any time (and in an emergency, we will respond gladly). There will be members of the regular congregation to help the priest and show you where to sit and when you need to move. Some parts of the service are for the whole congregation to join in, some will be just for you and the godparents. We like to prepare a personalised service just for you and your child, so you will be asked if you would like to have a photograph on the front of the order of service.
For the baptism itself, parents and godparents will be asked by the priest to gather first at the front of church and then around the font at the back. The priest will ask the parents and godparents to make declarations on behalf of the child.
It is an informal and friendly service and we hope you will feel at home. The whole service takes about 25-30 minutes.
As most services take place in the afternoon, we do not have the resources for an organist and so the service doesn't include hymns. If you would like to include hymns, then we can arrange a baptism in the Communion service itself on a Sunday morning
Making decisions and promises
When you bring your child for baptism, you will be asked to declare publicly on behalf of your child that you believe in God and that you will bring your child up to follow Jesus.
You will be asked to answer, on your child's behalf, that you have decided to turn away from everything which is evil or sinful and to turn instead towards Christ. The declarations made by you and the child's godparents will be made in front of the congregation. It is not unknown for one of the parents to be unwilling to make these important decisions and promises, particularly if they declare themselves to be an atheist. They may excuse themselves from standing and making these commitments, but are welcome to be present at the baptism. They will not be asked to come forward. We would rather these promises be made without hypocrisy and would not seek to embarrass anyone who objected. Godparents unwilling to make these promises, clearly, cannot be Godparents (they are known rather as Sponsors); and so you should choose Godparents carefully based upon their willingness to commit to Christ and to your child.
We also expect Godparents to be present. If they are unavailable or otherwise engaged then they cannot be Godparents. There is only one exception to this: if a member of HM Forces is on active deployment. When this has happened, the Godparent can make his promises over the telephone.
However, if you aren't sure about being able to make these promises, if you simply don't believe, then it may be that baptism isn't for you. We don't routinely offer the Thanksgiving for the Birth of a Child unless your child was (for example) baptised in an emergency when they were born, as this is the chance to thank God for that already baptised child.
The Christenings page on the Church of England's website is a good resource to understand more about baptism.
The Declarations
We all know there is good and evil in the world. The declarations are a Christian way of asking if we will turn away from eveil and tun towards good.
During the service, you will be asked to make the following declarations:
Do you turn to Christ as Saviour?
Parents and godparents: I turn to Christ.
Do you submit to Christ as Lord?
Parents and godparents: I submit to Christ.
Do you come to Christ the way, the truth and the life?
Parents and godparents: I come to Christ.
Godparents
It is recommended that your child should have at least three godparents. Traditionally there would be two of the same sex as the child and one of the opposite sex. Godparents should be adults, or at least older teenagers. A useful rule of thumb is that they need to be old enough to be responsible parents if they are to be responsible godparents. Sometimes we have requests for older brothers or sisters to be godparents, but unless they are adults this is usually not appropriate and we would rather involve them in the service in other ways – for example, holding the candle.
Godparents must be baptised themselves, and preferably confirmed. Baptism is a good opportunity for both parents and Godparents to think about their own faith and commitment, since both will be making wide-ranging and serious promises during the service. If someone wishes to be a Godparent but has not been baptised, then the parish clergy are happy to baptize them as well, either in an evening service or in another large celebration. We do not see that as the end of the matter, though, because if you are baptised to be a Godparent, we will also encourage you to continue the journey of faith onto Confirmation.
Important Symbols
A number of symbols will be used during the service itself:
The sign of the cross
The priest will make the sign of the cross on your child’s forehead. This is like an invisible badge to show that Christians are united with Christ and must not be ashamed to stand up for their faith in him.
The priests says: ‘Christ claims you for his own. Receive the sign of the cross. Do not be ashamed to confess the faith of Christ crucified.’
The priest will invite you and the godparents to sign the cross on the child’s forehead as well.
Water
The priest will pour water on your child’s head. Water is a sign of washing and cleansing. In baptism it is a sign of being washed free from sin and beginning a new life with God.
Water is a sign of life, but also a symbol of death. When we are baptised our old life is buried in the waters and we are raised to new life with Christ.
Candles
Jesus is called the light of the world. A large candle will be lit In the church and you will be given a lighted candle at the end of the service as a reminder of the light which has come into your child’s life. It is up to you, the child’s godparents and the church community to help your child reject the world of darkness and follow a way of life that reflects goodness and light, and shares this light with others.
Some people like to light the candle on the anniversary of the baptism to remember their child's baptism and you may like to do the same.
When did baptism start?
Jesus was baptised in the river Jordan. This was a turning point in his life (you can read the story in the Bible: at the beginning of Mark’s Gospel in the New Testament). Jesus told his followers to baptise others as a sign that they had turned away from their old life, and begun a new life as Christ’s disciples, members of his Body, having been assured of God’s forgiveness.
Baptisms often took place as the sun rose on Easter Morning in a river or a body of water: new Christians were dipped under water, marking their death to an old way of life, and lifted up again as a sign of new birth. At our baptism we are reminded of its link with the rising of Jesus Christ from the dead on the first Easter morning.
Children in Church
The church belongs to all the people of God – the children just as much as the adults – and they are welcome at any service. It is sometimes nerve wracking for parents, though, if they are worried about how their children will behave, and what will happen if they get restless. Please don't worry about it - we love having children and the joy, noise and chaos they bring. Here are some tips from those who have brought their own children to church and survived!
Children like to be able to see what is going on. The temptation of many parents is to sit at the back, but often children are happier and feel more involved if they are at the front. If they want to stand or sit that is fine.
Children, like adults, take a while to feel at home in new surroundings. They will soon pick up from you and from the other people in church, when it is time to stand and sing and when to sit and listen or kneel and pray. Bringing your child to church will enable them (and you) to feel at home in God’s house.
Please feel free to use our children's area and toys. Or, perhaps bring some quiet toys and books. There are also toys in drawstring bags at the side of church for your children to play with during the service.
If children become restless, don’t hesitate to take them for a wander, perhaps into the Churchyard then come back again.
Around Church there are candles, lecturns and other things that might cause injury. Please keep an eye on them if they go for a wander. It is often better to let small children wander (and wonder) rather than trying to tie them down bored in a pew.
Frequently Asked Questions
Q. What is the difference between a baptism and a christening?
A. None, they are just different words for the same thing.
Q. What is the right age for baptism?
A. Baptism can happen at any age. What matters is that those concerned believe it is right to ask for baptism. Teenagers and adults can also be baptised—ask the parish clergy about this.
Q. What does it cost?
A. There is no fee expected. The baptism service is free, but this church needs to be paid for. We therefore ask that you consider a donation for the upkeep of the Church. If we (and that includes you) cannot pay for the upkeep of the Church then these ancient churches will simply not be around for your child’s children or grandchildren. Additionally, a collection plate is in church for any donation from members of the congregation - if you are a tax payer, please put your donation in one of the printed envelopes and sign them as we can receive an extra 25p for every pound you generously give, at no extra expense or effort from you. Ask those coming to the baptism to consider bringing something to give for the future children to be baptised in this church.